Showing posts with label angst. Show all posts
Showing posts with label angst. Show all posts

7.12.10

Today...
...is my birthday.
19th birthday.
Weeee. ♥

Well, first things first.
I started my day doing my NCP at 2 in the morning. And then I prepared for my duty at 3 am (my shift was 6am-2pm). My Mom greeted me first, giving me a kiss on my forehead. She can't quite believe that I'm now a year older. Hehe...
I was thinking positively ever since I woke up. It's my day after all. I was assigned in Ward 9 where critically ill patients are waiting to be taken cared of...so I have to be positive and channel good spirits for them to feel that there is still life to look forward to. But that day, when we were still doing our rounds, a patient of my classmate died. Arrest. Then postmortem.
I looked at my recently admitted comatosed patient. She was not very well. The doctor knew. Her daughter knew.
I knew too.
I prayed that she won't die. Not now. Not now.

But she did.

Her agony was not prolonged...
but her daughter's pain was.
Mine too.

I learned, despite that inevitable event in my shift. I realized that with the gift of life, another year, that God gave to me, someone also passes away in order to GO BACK to HIM. It's a part of nature. It's balance. Homeostasis.
I was sad, yes, but I did not want to dwell on sad feelings too much. I thank all those who greeted me...
THANK YOU!
Mingaw man, pero I still thank you for bombarding my wall with greetings! I enjoyed replying on your posts... And that made my day complete.

THANK YOU!


Love lots,
Blaise
Now 19 ♥

30.6.10


Yiruma

Sung by: Hienie Dao

Kiss The Rain

I often close my eyes
And I can see you smile
You reach out for my hand
And I'm woken from my dream
Although your heart is mine
It's hollow inside
I never had your love
And I never will

CHORUS
And every night
I lie awake
Thinking maybe you love me
Like I've always loved you
But how can you love me
Like I loved you when
You can't even look me straight in my eyes

VRS 2/3
I've never felt this way
To be so in love
To have someone there
Yet feel so alone
Aren't you supposed to be
The one to wipe my tears
The on to say that you would never leave

The waters calm and still
My reflection is there
I see you holding me
But then you disappear
All that is left of you
Is a memory
On that only, exists in my dreams

CHORUS

VRS 4
I don't know what hurts you
But I can feel it too
And it just hurts so much
To know that I can't do a thing
And deep down in my heart
Somehow I just know
That no matter what
I'll always love you

VRS 1

So why am I still here in the rain