Haven't got any sleep since yesterday. last friday we had this Rite of Passage, which is more associated with prom. and we were sent home quite early. 9 o'clock!! but then i reached home about ten. then i went to bed a quarter before twelve because i watched t.v. The next day i attended the vocational jamboree in CICC, together with about six thousand youth people on the grounds. There were dozens of congregation booths around the place. we didn't get any sleep at all. we just had cups of coffee and food... it was tiring, yet fun, for i was dealing with lots of people and with God.
i just laid down on my malong and stared at the velvety sky, the clouds swirling around the beautiful moon above us. it was such a beautiful sight to see... even the scene where the sky welcomed the inevitable coming of the dawn. it was so lovely, brilliant, nostalgic. Full moon...


i wish i could see another moon monopoly... and sunrise.

I can't find any reason to say I'm okay
when it's clear that I'm not.
Though i can hide what's deep inside of me,
the pain is too hard for me to undo the knot.

the day has come for me to say
"I've had enough of your sweet lies. I'm leaving."
But if he says he's going to try again (a lie again!)
c'mon, what is he playing at? is he not sick of fooling... around?

this melancholy in the depths of my translucent orbs
are too way too silent
but when a smile erupts on my lips
it doesn't mean i'm happy.
it's another kind of pretending
that deep inside I'm hurting. ..

*bem*
(just felt like writing such stuff...)

like that's what you call moment...
hehe...
just making fun.

If everything is just a game,
would you ever want to gamble?

think, think well.

or you may lose the chance
to win the game
that may turn real in the end.

It's your loss...
if that's the case.



One time i was wondering if he understands me. But then, all he did when we have time to chat was just to make fun at me. I was patient, but then grew tired. not because I'm losing hope. But because i couldn't quite take the thought that all my efforts have come to waste because he chose to ignore every bit of it. he's implying to me that i should say that everything's 'quits'. yeah right. call that 'quits'. in short, it's
PANG CHUI LAO.
That's right. just forget about it. not the worth of time.
the gamble's over, dude.

You know what i feel today?



just like this dog...



i feel... confused.

I just had my interview in CNU... I dunno if i passed. but honestly, i was expecting that the interview would last long with a dozen of questions to be answered... i didn't expect the interview to be that short or quite easy. i wasn't given any situation, just personal ones like "tell me 'bout yourself", "what's your hobby" and others. But everything had gone well...
oh, talking about Valentine's day, it was okay. but in the afternoon, it was really funny, wacky, weird, CRAZY! Sigh. i'll just save the details next time. kanang okay na tanan kabuang...

anyway, HAPPY VALENTINE"S EVERYONE!

Just got a long way to go...
I'm writing a script for the Tribute to service, see, and my ideas are going down the drain.
Hahai, but I'm making up for it. This is my last project, i guess, before i end my walk as the Pres. gotta do this right... and perfect.
wish me luck!